The birds, not the people. Not to be confused with ducks, geese, or other web-footed aquatic birds. You can spot them on freshwater lakes throughout Michigan, eating fish and pebbles from the bottom (gotta get that fiber somehow).

These European invaders have been the scourge of the Great Lakes since the 1980s, when they were released in the ballast of cargo ships. Now the beaches of the Great Lakes are festooned with their sharp shells, and water-shoe makers are making tidy profits off of Michiganders. If anyone has any eradication ideas, we’re taking suggestions.