Many Detroit bars have prominently displayed CCTV screens for patrons to keep an eye on their cars. Not as immediately entertaining as ESPN, but it can be hard to look away. Imagine if things got weird and you got to watch a bar fight or drug bust from the comfort of your barstool. Better television than anything cable can provide.

Weed superstores. I don’t want to hear your high school debate team talking points about “tax revenue” or “personal liberty.” There shouldn’t be this many weed stores in Michigan. They make our state so much uglier and trashier—this is an observable fact.