The Definitive Ranking of Michigan Area Codes

In the old days you knew a man by his coat of arms or the crest he wore on his shield. In the new days you know a man, and the place from whence he came, by the area code at the beginning of his cellphone number. In our era of maximum mobility and transience, it’s these three numbers which remain, like the shield of yore, as a last marker of personal identification and local culture.

While all area codes have their strengths and weaknesses, some are greater than others. I am sorry to say it, but it must be said. And in acknowledgement of this fact, it’s high time we rank the the area codes of our fine state, from most meager to most noble.

313

313 is the lowliest of our Michigan area codes. Comprising a small but dense territory on the eastern side of Wayne county, the 313 area code covers the good people of Detroit. While beautiful Grosse Pointe is located in the 313 region, it’s only a very small piece of the pie. All in all, the 313 is a tough place. Detroit has had a rough half century, but the proud people of the 313 area code aren’t going to give up, and they aren’t going to give in. 313 might see greatness again.

734

Washtenaw, Wayne, and Monroe counties. These are the lands of 734. Downriver isn’t the greatest place to be, but it’s not the worst either. As the old saying goes, “It could always be worse.” The 734 is dangerously close to Ohio, and it could be so much worse; you could be in Ohio. Count your blessings.

517

A land of beautiful farmland and fragrant crop, the worst roads (Hillsdale County) in the state, and some of the most corrupt individuals you will ever know (Lansing politicians). There’s beautiful Hillsdale College, and there’s the state prison in Jackson. There’s the state capital and MSU, but Lansing is kind of a dump. The 517 area code is a land of extremes. Choose your adventure wisely.

810

On the edge of farmland and the edge of the city, 810 is a liminal territory. There may be the possibility for greatness waiting here, but the various tragedies of Flint have taken a toll, and the truth is there’s just not much that goes on in that little strip north of Detroit.

586

This small little area code, bridging Oakland County and Macomb County, is working class suburban America. The auto industry has drawn workers from the 586 area code for generations, and today the place is a just fine place for families in the Detroit area to live. We can’t say there is much to see here other than Lake St. Clair. No one comes for tourism, and it’s not a hub of finance, but it’s a decent place to call home.

989

The 989 area code covers a massive swath of the northeastern side of the state. Some of the most rugged roads I’ve driven in the Lower Peninsula have been up in the northern corner of the 989 region. While the 989 area is pretty desolate and pretty rough, the untapped beauty is abundant. Nearly all of Lake Huron’s often overlooked shore is found in the 989 after all, a place of untapped Northern opportunity.

269

The southwest corner of Michigan is a place many only pass through on their way to Chicago. But the land is good and the people are too. Like the 517 area, the 269 is a land of opposites. Kalamazoo is kind of an unfortunate place, but Kalamazoo College is good and Western Michigan University is fun. Benton Harbor, Saugatuck, and Douglas are all there too, but getting down by Indiana, the roads get pretty nasty with all the trucks. Ultimately, the 269 is West Michigan and thusly, virtuous. Beautiful land, God-fearing people, and a nice place to be with some room to breathe.

906

The 906 is, of course, the U.P. They’ve only got one area code up there and 906 is it. The U.P. is some of the greatest, most difficult, and most mysterious land in our fine state. To have a 906 area code in front of your number is a of badge honor. It shows you aren’t a weakling and that you’ve put your time in up north. You don’t just get a 906 area code, you have to earn it, and for that reason it’s a coveted code.

248/972

The 248/972 region is very nice. As pleasant a place as any suburban area can be, the 248/972 territory is full of good families, good schools, and good places to live. Troy, Farmington Hills, Southfield, Rochester Hills, Royal Oak, Novi, Ferndale, Birmingham, and Bloomfield Hills. These are the towns of the region. While I am not a suburban enjoyer myself, I must say that if I had to live in one, I might live in one of these.

616

The 616 region is quintessential West Michigan. Grand Rapids and Holland are the civilizational pillars here, with everyone in the surrounding areas in their orbit. The 616 area code is just about the nicest place you can live in Michigan. Quiet, safe, religious. You’ve got the Big Lake, you’ve got farmland, and you’ve got GR with all that a city provides. While I live in the greatest area code, if I had to move somewhere else, it would certainly be the 616.

231

The most elite area code in Michigan is, you guessed it, the 231 region. Other areas might be nice in their own ways, but it’s impossible to escape 231 supremacy. The 231 area code includes the majority of all Lake Michigan’s sandy shoreline and even a bit of Lake Huron’s. The nicest places you all visit are in the 231 area. Traverse City, Leelanau Peninsula, Frankfort, Charlevoix, Harbor Springs, Petoskey, and Glen Arbor. Sleeping Bear Dunes, Boyne Mountain, Interlochen, and Manistee National Forest. Safe enough that you barely need to lock your doors, beautiful enough to make up for the difficult winters, and empty enough so you are never stuck in traffic. 231 supremacy is a fact of life.

Whether you hail from a more lowly area code, or you bask in the sublime glory of a most tasteful 616 or 231, you must be proud of your heritage, you must be proud of your area code.